A Faulty Experiment Revised

There is a miraculous text called Gita. Everytime I read it I think that I have figured it all out but every next reading reveals things that were yet hidden. My thinking in college days was not to be influenced by happiness or sorrow and act in all the situations being detached as a "karmyogi". But it seems that there is much more to it than that. While I tried to be detached from the fruits of actions, I later realised that I became detached from actions itself. I never tried to accomplish anything and thus the question of being detached from the fruits never arise in the first place.

Now that I am trying to accomplish something, the motive is to prove that I am capable and to establish a niche for myself in the society. But it seems that this motive in itself is at fault. I forced myself to think sometimes that I am doing this to just gain some knowledge and not to prove anything. But you can't lie to yourself, can you? And I have experienced the disadvantages attached to this thinking. I am not able to concentrate on my studies. I think about the result of exam. I think, what if I am not able to clear the exam? If I have chosen the right path by opting to start the preparation. All these questions have their effects and hampers the concentration required for preparation.

It seems that I was content, even if partially, with the result of an experiment, the basic assumption of which was faulty. I was trying to be detached from the fruits of action when there were no real efforts. And when I am making a real effort, following the path is painstakingly difficult. But here lies the greatest beauty of Gita I guess. It never discards you. It has an inherent faith in the ability of man to do anything and hence it says- "Abhyasen tu kaunteyam". It realises the difficulty attached with the proposed path and itself says that without practise its not achievable and even with greatest of efforts you may gain very little. But the theme is to keep practising and it would surely make you a better person tomorrow. So I shall practice. 

Thank you for saving the democracy My Lord

I didn’t have the slightest bit of interest in politics in my adolescent phase. As I grew up I heard things about democracy, character of politicians and the process of election in which general public would go to vote and elect a politician who was supposed to take decisions for them and strive to develop the society in a better way. The election days were like festivals, not like the usual ones in which we would get sweets or new cloths or light crackers. But as in other festivals, there were grand preparations. Loud-speakers would call the names of politicians and discuss their agenda. People engaged in discussions about the policies of political parties and their candidates. One thing I could make out of all those discussions was how pathetic they all were and how they would have to choose the least corrupt or the best amongst all those good-for-nothings. And as the election-day came, they would all go to vote. I heard from my father how he had to wait in the line for almost whole day to get his vote registered. I couldn’t fathom their logic. I asked to myself and to them why you waste so much of your efforts in such a thing. Why vote anyone if you know that they aren’t going to do anything good for the area, leave alone the country. They tried to convince me by saying that this is a democracy and democracies run on elections. You will also have to vote when you come of the age. While it isn’t compulsory, you ought to give your vote because you would be contributing significantly for your country. Their logic never convinced me and I thought I would never vote until recently. Until I am fully sure that my vote goes to right person I wouldn’t vote because my vote to a wrong person would indirectly make me a contributor in the wrongdoings of all those corrupt persons. I thought why can’t there be a simple button or ballot saying that I don’t want choose any of these bastards. Instead my vote should indicate that none of these morons are capable or moral enough to rule over me.

And as if like a miracle, Supreme Court heard my words and more importantly of those who were relentlessly trying to convince those same bastards to incorporate such an important electoral reform. While in my opinion trying to convince those bastards was always a lost cause, I had in my mind that someone must be hearing the pleas because democracy in a vast country like India wouldn’t have survived if there were none. I think that such an important step has come after a huge delay but as they say, better late than never. The greatest dilemma in this whole scenario is that the one functionary of democracy that was supposed to bring about this change is shamelessly staring at the real lords of democracy to guide them through their works. And this is not an isolated event. Now that I am aware of many of the decisions taken by Supreme Court and its implications, I can safely say that all this time they have been the real champions of the democracy.

On the other hand, our system of democracy is not supposed to function in the way it is functioning now. Courts shall never enter the field of legislation and reforms. They are the protectors of law. Their scope shall be limited in providing the meaning of a law and enforce it. But even knowing all this, I am glad that they are forcing their way into the muddy path where they are not supposed to be. These bastards are the reason why they are there in the first place and they will be there until these bastards come to their senses. I don’t know for how long these benevolent champions of democracy would be able to continue in this path but for now they have surely been able to reinforce my faith in democracy. I hope for a day when I would be able to say the same thing about those bastards and if only hoping doesn’t work I shall try to enter their field to show them how things can change for better. But for now I hope because “hope is a good thing, probably the best of the things” as beautifully described in The Shawshank Redemption.

Note: Replace bastards/morons with politicians/legislators.

Mind doesn’t work that way, silly

Standing on the roof of my hostel, smoking weed and listening to Pink Floyd I was trying to justify my philosophy of “live in the moment”, “let your instinct guide you” and “do whatever makes you feel happy”. Later, after studying many great philosophers and thinkers I got to know that this isn’t a prophesy I could boast of discovering. On the contrary, many people said this, lived this theory throughout their life and lived it to a degree which I could never have imagined. But then came stages in my life which convinced me that it wasn’t enough to do things that make me happy for the moment. While it shall be an important aspect of my life, it was also necessary to have a ‘greater goal' or I shall replace the word 'greater goal' with 'long-term plan' if it sounds too cliché. The balance between these two goals shall reap greater rewards as according to Budhha “Avoid the extremes”. I now believe and try to incorporate in my life, the theory that without significant effort and facing hardships one can’t feel the absolute maximum of happiness.

The afore-mentioned theory can be beautifully summarized in the phrase “Gold glitters when it passes the test of fire”. This and many other phrases have been taught to me many times in my childhood but the significance of a philosophy can only be realized through experiments. I pity the sons of great businessmen or celebrities who never had any hardship in their life for they can’t experience the joy of transition from being poor to rich. How can one discover the true richness and taste of water if he had never been thirsty in his life? You can’t discover this feeling in any book or by reading the biography Budhha or Gandhi. You have to discover yourself it by experimenting in your life.

So, shall I leave behind all those little moments of happiness in pursuit of that long-term goal which I am not even sure of achieving? Never! Firstly I am not even sure of achieving the goal. I am not absolutely sure of my capabilities. Secondly, even if I achieve the target, what is the guarantee that this leads to a happier life? I would have ambitions even then and I would not remain human if I don’t. Finally and most importantly, these small and insignificant moments are the ones that define my life. The moment of success will also be a moment if it is destined to be but I can’t sacrifice these innumerable moments in exchange of that one uncertain moment.

Therefore, balance seems to be the only option. Balance between “living in the moment” and “a greater goal”. Balance between “giggling” and “the final laughter or heart-ache”. Balance between “booze and weed nights” and “study nights”. This balance shall define my life for now. I say now because I know nothing is permanent. This theory would have its limitations and I would follow some other theories in coming time. And I am perfectly OK with that because what is life if not change. Even my facebook cover pic says so.

God's Single Blunder

Staring at the sky in a cloudless starry night or watching the serene surrounding of Uttarkashi and Hrishikesh, I exclaim "How Beautiful". But why these things seem beautiful to me? Probably due to the simplicity apparent in the surrounding. No artificialism. No mechanisation. No intelligent human interference in the simple nature created by God or any other super-power or just existing there by chance. They have their purpose, a definite life-time and power to influence other entities but not like humans.

Man! you surprise me. You started as a baby, learning from creatures around you. You befriended some who were helpful, murdered others that came in your way and you would stop at nothing. But really this isn't your fault. This is your father's fault.With the power to think, who wouldn't do such a thing. When a tiger kills for his hunger, you call him a beast but being at the top of your society, being deprived of no facility, no necessity, you kill anyway. When a tornado or an earthquake destroys one of your cities you call it a natural disaster but you keep destroying nature's beauty and at the same time, your own peace of mind anyway. You think you will achieve everything but in this process of achieving you lose track of what you gained and lost. You don't even think before acquiring a possession whether it is worth acquiring or not.

The ability of a man to think is his greatest weapon and the God's Single Blunder i would say. He would seek and know everything there is to know but the Ultimate truth. For if he knows that truth he would become God and that knowledge would no more remain the Ultimate truth. If there is any God he wouldn't risk such a knowledge to the unworthy man. If there isn't any, by definition this rank goes to man, being all powerful and no other superior power in sight, and in my opinion he has not yet been able to justify his candidature. If there exists any God my only prayer to him would be to make a subtle change in the process of thinking because if he doesn't do it he will be the man's next victim.

सफ़र

आज जब इस गुमशुम शाम में ठहरे हुए लम्हों के बीच रुक कर सोचा,
तो जाना की हमने तो ऐसे ही जीना सिखा है, गाना सिखा है, मुश्कुराना सिखा है,
पर रोना नहीं सिखा, ये अदा तो बेवक्त, अनचाहे ऐसे ही आ जाती है.
काश के हम रोना भी सीख लेते तो ये दर्द इतनी ग़मगीन ना होती.

तुमने हमे क्या नहीं दिया, ये जिंदगी उन हसीन लम्हों की ही तो कायल है,
लेकिन वो कहते हैं न की हर सिक्के के दो पहलु होते हैं,
हम ये समझ न पाए की हर हसीं शाम के बाद एक काली रात भी होती है,
वो रात जो मुश्किल है, संघर्षपूर्ण और अनिश्चित है, लेकिन खाली नहीं है.

ये बात नहीं की ऐसी परिश्थितियों का ये पहला मौका हो,
और ये नाव किसी अनजान मजधार में हिलकोरे खा रही हो.
नहीं, हम इस छोटे मायूश टापू पे पहले भी आ चुके हैं,
लेकिन कभी कभी लगता है की तब ये टापू इतनी वीरानी तो नही थी.

सुना तो बहोत है की हर रात की एक सुनहरी सुबह है,
 लेकिन इस रात का क्या, ये भी तो सफ़र का ही एक हिस्सा है. 
 हमे मंजूर नहीं की ये रात बस उन शामो की धुंधली तस्वीर बन कर रह जाये,
 क्युंकी हम तो राही हैं  उस सफ़र के, जो मंजिलों की मोहताज़ नही हुआ करती.